Sakura Got Run Over By A Nindeer
by Ku-chyan
Summary: Major Sakura bashing.....but it's all for the Holiday spirit!


Hiya! I don't own Naruto, or the song Grandma Got Run Over By A Reindeer. Enjoy!  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
{An almost sad looking Naruto stands on a patch of red snow. He brings a microphone up to his  
  
lips and begins to sing.}  
  
"Sakura got run over by a nindeer   
  
Walking home from Ino's house Christmas Eve"  
  
{ A panicked Sakura runs past the scream, frantically screaming and waving her arms around.   
  
Chasing after her is a big black nindeer}  
  
"You can say there's no such thing as Santa  
  
But as for me and Sasuke, we believe"  
  
{Naruto and Sasuke stand back-to-back, nervously glancing at the sky above them}  
  
"She'd been drinking to much sake,  
  
And we begged her not to go"  
  
{We see a drunk looking Sakura shaking her head at the other genins, who are trying to push her  
  
out the door.}  
  
"But she'd left her lucky kunai,  
  
So she stumbled out the door into the snow"  
  
{Sakura trips out of the doorway and lands flat on her ass in the snow. Ino slams the door behind  
  
her.}  
  
"When we found her Christmas mornin',  
  
At the scene of the attack"  
  
{We see Kakashi happily poking Sakura's dead body with a stick.}  
  
"There were hoof prints on her forehead,  
  
And incriminating 'Claus marks on her back"  
  
{We see Iruka quietly trying to count all the prints on Sakura's huge forehead, but he keeps losing  
  
count every few hundred}  
  
"Sakura got run over by a nindeer,  
  
Walking home from Ino's house Christmas Eve"  
  
{Sakura runs by, being chased by the big black nindeer, and runs into a tree. When her body hits  
  
the floor the nindeer proceeds to prance all over it}  
  
"You can say there's no such thing as Santa,  
  
But as for me and Sasuke, we believe"  
  
{Naruto and Sasuke watch from the side as a big fat man dressed in red runs by slowly, trying to  
  
catch his escaped nindeer}  
  
"Now we're all so proud of Rock Lee  
  
He's been takin' this so well"  
  
{We see Rock Lee's smiling face. It looks more happy then usual}  
  
"See him in there watching DBZ,  
  
Drinkin' sake and playin' cards with Gaara's siblings"  
  
{Rock Lee is sitting in front of a wide-screen television, a forgotten card game in front of him.   
  
Beside him are Temari and Kankuro , both with large bottles of sake}  
  
"It's not Christmas without Sakura,  
  
Everyone's all dressed in black"  
  
{We see Kiba glaring at Naruto, who accidentally knocked ink into the laundry machine.   
  
Everyone's clothes are now stained black}  
  
"And we just can't help but wonder,  
  
Should we open up her gifts or send them back?"  
  
{All the ninja's are gathered around a small pile of gifts. Shino shakes one, listening to it rattle, and  
  
then throws it over his shoulder and into the fireplace. The whole thing catches on fire quickly,  
  
since it was a lump of coal.}  
  
"Now the ramen's on the table,  
  
And the pudding made of blood [Itachi's Special]"  
  
{We see Neji grab Naruto by the back of his collar when he attempts to attack the ramen. Hinata  
  
gently pokes the pudding with a spoon, and jumps back when it begins to ooze sand. In the  
  
background we hear Gaara's evil laughter, followed by coughing.}  
  
"And a pink and silver candle,  
  
That would just have matched the hair in Sakura's wig"  
  
{Ten-Ten holds up a pink wig, and then glances at the candle. She shrugs and throws the wig to the  
  
floor, where Akamaru later makes it his new chew-toy.}  
  
"I've warned all my friends and neighbors,  
  
Better watch out for yourself"  
  
{We see Naruto running from an angry Chouji after trying to tell him to "watch out for the fat  
  
man". We then see him running from an angry women with a broom after asking her if she "kept her  
  
windows and doors locked at night".}  
  
"They should never give a license,  
  
To a man who drives a sleigh and plays with elves"  
  
{Sasuke sits by a big desk covered in papers. He shifts through them before pulling out the pictures  
  
on Santa's last driver's license and the one he has now. It is very apparent that, just like everyone  
  
else, Santa takes bad license photos}  
  
"Sakura got run over by a nindeer,  
  
Walking home from Ino's house Christmas Eve"  
  
{Shikamaru sees Sakura run from the nindeer, and thinks about helping......He decides it's to much  
  
of a bother.}  
  
"You can say there's no such thing as Santa,  
  
But as for me and Sasuke, we believe"  
  
{Naruto lowers the microphone from his lips and Sasuke walks up. He is carrying two large laser  
  
guns. After handing one to Naruto, they both aim up.}  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Sorry if I offended anyone!! I really don't mind Sakura that much, except in the DVD's. But she is  
  
my least favorite female character, sooo......{Shrug} Review please, and Happy Holidays!!!! 


End file.
